Mistakes of Youth: The Blog (Powered by EXCELLENCE!)

We now live in the brave new year of 2010. Do the cartoons dropping this year have the bravery to match, though? As of right now, not really!

Cobra the Animation: Rokunin no Yuushi

Upon learning that this new Cobra series was still in the hands of Magic Bus and not MadHouse–as some sources had stated–I was overcome by an unrelenting feeling of despair. The Psycho Gun and Time Drive OVAs weren’t bad per se, they just lacked the pizazz of the original TV series from the early 1980s. Part of this was due to some really cheap looking animation, and the other part was due to the fact that it lacked the same flourish as the old TV series. This can probably be attributed to the direction by original manga author Terasawa Buichi. Comic book artists should stick to writing comics, you know?

However, once this first episode of Cobra the Animation: Rokunin no Yuushi cut to a famous Dezaki “postcard memories” still shot, I knew everything was going to be okay. Yes, there’s PSX-level CG that looks like it fell out of Groove Jigoku 5 (Hat tip to Sub for that one.), the colouring looks like a digital production from the turn of the century at times, and the character animation is kind of stiff. But who the fuck cares (aside from snobby sakuga nerds, that is) this is Cobra, motherfucker, and this time they mean business. Dezaki may not be directing the thing–he’s on storyboard duty–but that alone makes all the difference. Now, if only they could switch out that generic orchestral score for the smooth disco background music from the original, things would be perfect. Well, they could fix the animation, too.

So Ra No Wo To

That W is silent, ok? That’s just an FYI to all those anime podcasters out there who can’t pronounce easy-to-pronounce Japanese words.

So Ra No Wo To, premiering in a block of TV called “The Power of Anime” is meant to show people what Japanese animation can really do. If that’s the case, it’s sad that what Japanese animation can really do is limited to some girl getting lost a lot. But I’m being cynical. It’s not as if the first episode of So Ra No Wo To is bad–it’s fairly typical and entertaining, but it’s not really living up to that Anime no Chikara claim right off the bat. We have some archetypal cute girls who do archetypal cute things against an unorthodox setting with a fairly interesting backstory, but nothing of interest really happens in this first episode to pull one in. This is par for the course with a lot of things, but when you’re touting the label THE POWER OF ANIME, I except to see that power.

Right now this show only really shines animation wise, and even then it’s something of a let down. I’m not one of those naysayers of the blobby K-ON! style, but it doesn’t really work well here. Loose forms such as these work in something like Gurren Lagann, or in something laid back like K-ON!, but they don’t really fit with the setting they’re trying to push here. All that said, I bet the second episode is going to be wonderful and great.

Chu-Bra!

Now, if there was ever a show truly deserving of that Anime no Chikara slot, Chu-Bra! is it. After all, it takes a powerful show to tackle the concept of a first-year middle-school girl who is an underwear enthusiast/tester. Honestly, this shit is creative. Some prudes have been creeped out by this show, but I honestly don’t think it’s dirty enough. But that’s just me, you know?

This first episode managed to satisfy my very low expectations, but I don’t know if it’ll be able to keep it up. It also has some random animal humour that I don’t get. Animation wise it’s nothing special, and the character designs go into weird places at times as far as face-shapes go.

I don’t have much hope that this will become the kind of silly show I can admire like, say, Sora no Otoshimono, but hopefully it can take charge and do something deliciously dirty and hilarious with its concept.

Aside from Japanese animation, I really enjoy older American movies. By old, I mean movies ranging from the Marx Brothers in the 1930s up until Indiana Jones in the early 1980s. Specifically, two film series that I’ve enjoyed since childhood are the original Star Wars movies and the aforementioned Jones series. Ever since I was a kid, I had always wanted to see more in the way of film from these two franchises. Films that expanded both upon their stories and universes. Years later, I got exactly that–the Star Wars prequel movies, and Indiana Jones 4. However, something had gone horribly wrong.

While both of these series provide a vast canvas by which writers can scrawl infinite amounts of sequels and side-stories upon, (and they have, in comics, books and video games that all range in quality, but we’re not talking about that) when they finally got around to it–many years later–the results came out rather pear-shaped. I suspect that one main factor that contributed to these movies failing was simply the time in which they were made. Both of these series–Indy and Star Wars–are very much products of their time. That’s not to say they aren’t timeless, but you simply can’t make movies like those anymore. Our current situation and environment just isn’t conducive to nurturing a creative process that can bring about a good new Star Wars or Indy flick.

As far as Indy goes, I actually didn’t think the new one was too bad. I mean, it wasn’t spectacular, but it kept my eyes on the screen and did things that made me entertained. However, there was something missing, and that was spirit. The spirit of 30 years ago and the spirit of young directors really wanting to make something spectacular. One of the key things that makes the Indy movies great is the amount of soul poured into producing a fun and exciting pulp-novel throwback with all the trimmings. By the time you get to Indy 4, it’s less a homage to old pulp serials and more a copy of itself. They were too distracted by the history that their previous films had, and neglected to harness what really  made those older films great.

The Star Wars prequels are a bit more dire, and you can’t really pin the time period in which they were made on why they failed, but I still feel it was part of the problem. There was too much of a break between when the old movies were made and when the new ones were. Perhaps if the prequels were made closer to when the originals came up, someone would have actually had the guts to walk up to Lucas and say, “Hey, you know? Jar Jar Binks may not be a great idea.” But instead–here in the 21st century–we get movies that look like cheap science fiction TV shows. I’m not joking, when I came across Attack of the Clones channel surfing I assumed it was some cheap TV show before checking what it was.

The fact that these movies were made within the last 10 years only compounds these problems. As I mentioned before, you just can’t make movies like these anymore. Society has become far too cynical for a film like Star Wars to be produced. The kind of energy present in the time in which these movies were made simply doesn’t exist anymore, and that effects things. Of course, there are a host of other issues as well, but they aren’t the issue at hand.

This can be seen in Japanese animation, as well. Look at how Gundam has changed over the past 30 years, and how fans are split between the old and new. While it hasn’t really changed for the worse, take a look at how time has effected Lupin and his cohorts. That said, one example (of many, actually) of a franchise that has not let time touch it is Cobra. Watch the first TV series, then watch the new OVA. Outside of the animation, they feel almost exactly the same. I guess we can attribute that to Terasawa Buichi’s direction, since time for this dude clearly has not moved since 1985.

I know that photo’s old, but I’m pretty sure he still looks like that.

The OVA is almost a dead art in the fast, 100MB-per-second world of today, but even so there were a few direct-to-video titles that hit shelves this year. Of course, they were either lame eroge adaptations, lackluster fanservice romps or straight up porn. However, despite these odds, an intrepid bunch of warriors came out on top, and wowed me with rape, psychoguns, and mad editing skills.

Sadly, my friends, this list will be free of porn. I did partake of a few ero titles this year, but I’ll leave commentary on them to the professional.

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Cobra is one of the most sexist, cheesy and silly shows ever made. Naturally, this also makes it one of the greatest shows ever made. I first watched Cobra a good several months ago, and even after 31 episodes of this stuff, I hungered for more! Thankfully, I happened to catch Cobra right on its 30th anniversary, and to celebrate this most auspicious occasion– THEY’RE MAKING MORE. And the new one is pretty good! Almost.

I’ll get the bad stuff out of the way first: this new OVA has some absolutely fucking horrible 3D CG. You’d think that by the year 2008 all anime studios would have figured out how to use this stuff, but reality is far too cruel. There’s fucking dumb 3D robots just walking around in the backgrounds of shots for no reason at all but to look dumb and out of place. I do think that Cobra’s ship turned out ok, but that’d be better done by traditional means. The rest is horrible, though. Especially Crystal Boy in the preview for the next episode. Guh. The normal animation is fine. Not terribly fluid, but not static either.

I guess another bad thing would be that Osamu Dezaki isn’t directing, but that’s only because the original mangaka Buichi Terasawa is in the director’s chair this time. I admit that Cobra kind of feels weird without a dramatic painted still every 5 seconds, but Terasawa’s direction captures everything we love about Cobra wonderfully. Not really a surprise, I guess.

Hopefully someone will sub this. I watched the first episode raw, and enjoyed it just fine since it was mainly action oriented. And honestly, fully understanding the dialogue in Cobra isn’t necessary, but I wouldn’t mind being able to understand more of his cocky one-liners.

It wasn’t until I saw a sub out for Lucky Tousen*: Great Guardians did I realize that the summer season had already started. So, before anything else starts, I guess I’ll list out my picks like I normally do!

You know, since the list of shows playing this season was so short, I assumed I’d only walk out of it with something like three or four shows, but after I went through and picked out everything, I came out with seventeen! Good thing some of those are short OVAs.

GOTTA WATCH IT EVEN IF I HAVE TO KILL A MAN

• Cobra (OVA): The mighty space returns to the small screen after 30 years to kick more ass. I love Space Adventure Cobra, and if this OVA can capture the magic of the original series, I’ll be in love. COBURAAAA~
• DETROIT METAL CITY (OVA): I’ve always been interested in the manga, but never read it. Hopefully Studio 4C will do a good enough job with their adaptation that I won’t have to!
• Hidamari Sketch x365 (TV): Honestly, I find Hidamari only works for me if I’m in the right mood. Otherwise, it’s boring. But, this is another Shaft/SHINBO combo, so it’s worth watching just for that.
• Lucky Star (OVA): More Lucky Star can’t be a bad thing. I liked the TV show well enough.
• Zero no Tsukaima ~Three Princesses’ Rondo~ (TV): Hey, fuck you guys, 0nT 2 was great and I don’t care what you say. I’m watching this one without a second thought. So long as they keep delivering more fanservice than plot, I’ll be happy!

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Cobra- The Movie: Released in July of ‘82, covers the first story arc. TV series was released later that year.
Cobra US Pilot: Cut together scenes from various episodes plus new animation, dubbed in English.

Cobra- The Movie

I don’t know much about the history of Cobra in Japan, but I can tell it was kind of a big deal. The manga ran for six years in Shounen Jump, spawned a classy theatrical film, a big-budget TV series, and its influence still runs subtly through the anime of today. I’m just guessing here, but it’s clear why things get made into movies: to cash in on a franchise. Cobra must have been big, and this is a pretty big movie. Now, Cobra’s a big guy, but I think this movie was too big for even him.

The Cobra movie is set in a different continuity than the TV series, but contains similar plot elements to the first arc and has the same characters. However, the only characters who actually look the same as they do in the TV show are Cobra and Lady, with the rest of the designs being either slightly similar or wildly different. The characters aren’t the only ones who had their designs changed, a lot of the mechanical designs are also different, and finer details are altered as well (for instance, in the movie, Cobra’s arm just changes into the Psycho-Gun, rather than the gun being covered by a fake arm.) I’m not sure if the movie designs are truer to the manga than the TV seires or vice versa, simply because I’ve not read the manga.

It’s hard to really write out the general plot of this movie, since it’s all revealed in this spot of expositional dialogue near the middle, and at that point it’s a spoiler, so there’s not much I can say. The movie starts with Jane, a bounty hunter, who asks Cobra for his help to do something. Cobra agrees because she’s pretty, and the movie gets under way. Basically the film takes the treasure hunt arc with the three sisters and turns it into something about saving the galaxy. A lot of the same plot points are there, but are all handled totally differently, and the ending isn’t nearly as good as the one in the TV show (which was actually the high point of the entire series for me.)

One thing that really works against this movie is that it tries to be an action movie, a drama, and an art film all at once. Chase scenes and shootouts are sprinkled between dramatic deaths and arty sequences, and as one can imagine, such a combination is not conducive to a film flowing well. The movie opens with fun SF action, but slowly begins to take itself too seriously, and this is really where the movie’s main flaw lies. Now, I’m not familiar with the original manga, but the Cobra TV series’ biggest draw is the balance between action, humour, and how generally unbelievable it is. The movie certainly is unbelievable (it’s SF, after all) but it takes its silliness too seriously, and thusly doesn’t feel fun. This isn’t to say it’s a bad movie by any means, but given what I expect out of Cobra, I’m a little disappointed.

On the technical side of things, about everything is at it should be. This is your typical big-budget ’80s film, so it’s real nice to look at. I’d say the animation quality is slightly above that of the already very nice looking TV series. As far as music goes, it starts off as synth stuff but as the movie gets more and more serious it brings in the proper orchestra for some competent but uninspiring tracks. The opening and ending numbers are pop songs from the time and do their job well.

From what I could tell, the voice cast is completely different from that of the TV series. Instead of TV’s Nachi Nozawa as Cobra, we have big shot singer Shigeuru Matsuzaki as the man in red. I was quite fond of Nozawa’s rendition of Cobra, but Matsuzaki does a good job. He cuts down on the goofy and plays it smooth, which works in the context of this movie, but I have a thing for Nozawa’s dumb laugh.

Despite all the shit I’m giving this movie, it’s really not bad at all. As a normal movie, it’s fine, but as a Cobra movie, it leaves something to be desired.

Cobra US Pilot

I guess TMS tried to sell Cobra to the US at one point in the ’80s. They really play up the “THIS IS LIKE STAR WARS” angle by calling the Pirate’s Guild “The Dark Side Clan”, having Cobra as the leader of some resistance movement and even giving cameos to robots who look too much like a certain duo from the original trilogy.

The pilot episode runs at about 22 minutes, and is really just footage from episodes 1 and 13 cut together with bits of new animation added where needed. It’s clear TMS tried to dumb this down for US audiences, what with the goofy synth BGM, changing Cobra from a lone wanderer to an underground hero of the people, and in general whitewashing the story to make it more kids-show-ish. The funny part is how badly they FAIL. Sure, while aspects of what they had could run alongside Robotech or G-Force, they still left in all the scantily clad women, the gambling and the deaths! At one point, funnily enough, in the new animation made for this pilot, a child gets shot. Sure, it’s robot child, but it’s still child getting shot. He doesn’t only get shot, but his skin burns away to reveal a flaming robot skeleton. Japan had some things down, but they were clearly unfamiliar with the US TV standards of the time.

This being made for English audiences, it’s dubbed into English. The dub sounds like your typical ’80s cartoon, but recorded on some really bad equipment. The episode ends with an instrumental version of Secret Desire, clearly in an attempt to wipe any hint of Japanese influence from the show. But the funny thing is the instrumental version still has the backup singers singing in Japanese. Hah!

Cobra does some filler, fights a dude named Salamander, then ends his TV show.

After the RUG-BALL arc Cobra goes filler for some episodes. I don’t mind, since this is what I was expecting out of the show in the first place– a bunch of standalone stories. I won’t go into detail about each of the episodes (mainly because I don’t remember all of them too well now) but they were all very good with some stinkers here and there that really weren’t that bad.

The show concludes with an epic story arc which pits Cobra against one of the baddest dudes in the universe: SALAMANDER. SALAMANDER, is so bad that he took both Cobra’s girl and Cobra’s robot, and now Cobra’s out for some revenge. However, Salamander is the SUPREME RULER of the Pirate’s Guild, so it’s going to take more than just Cobra to bring this motherfucker down. So, Cobra embarks on an epic quest to bring together some of his old mates– Doug, Pumpkin and Bud. What follows is a series of prison breaks, gun fights and high-speed chases, all of which lead to the final showdown against Salamander, complete with a bunch of crazy plot twists to spice it all up.

This arc is about as entertaining as the RUG-BALL arc, and both are more fun than the first arc. However, both don’t conclude nearly as fantastically. The high point of the series for me was the end of the first arc, so nothing can really surpass that in terms of awesomeness, but this arc ends the show nicely. I can’t help but feel that the last episode was far too rushed, though. I think they could have run it for at least one more episode.

In the end, I really enjoyed Cobra. It’s a great show in that it was just pure and honest fun, and never really tried to be anything more than that. Some of the standalones grew weak near the end, but overall it was an incredibly good series, and one that I think a lot of people should go back and check out. Its influence can be seen in a number of modern classics, such as Cowboy Bebop and Outlaw Star, so it should probably be top priority to anyone who is a fan of those shows especially. And really, how can you not like a show where the main guy’s fake arm flies back to him on its own, and all the girls wear basically nothing?

“COBRA”
VOCALS: Yoko Maeno
COMPOSITION: Yuji Ohno

Darkness falls over town (What’s going on?)
Midnight Fog (Midnight Fog)
If the lonely silhouette moves,
It’s definitely him.
COBRA, leaving me blue
COBRA, missing you true
COBRA, only few memories after you
On your back, that burden that follows you is
The name of a man
This burden will never forgive you!
Peace & Love

Download

——

It’s litterally impossible to find the lyrics for this song on the internet, so I copied ILA’s translation. Thusly, it’s only the first verse– the full version has one extra verse. I changed the wording around and changed what ILA thought was French to the original English lyrics.

Today on Cobra: Cobra robs an art museum, coaches a sports team and saves a race of people!

Currently 2/3 of the way through Cobra, and it’s still as entertaining as it was when I first clicked open episode 1. The production values have stayed solid, the writing has been mostly fresh and in general it’s just been a fucking good time.

The 15th episode places Cobra in a very Lupin III-ish role as a museum thief. He’s doing a favour for an old friend who doesn’t much time left. See, his friend’s planet was overrun by The Guild, and they have also stolen a very precious item to the planet and placed it on display in their museum of the planet’s treasures. It’s another exciting one-shot filled with the typical Cobra action and humour, which is as always thoroughly entertaining. One thing I should note about this episode is that Night at the Museum so totally copied off of it. Just watch it and you’ll see why.

Episodes 16 through 19 follow Cobra as he enters to world of RUG-BALL. RUG-BALL is one part baseball, one part American football (the name suggests rugby, the uniforms suggest American football) and it is the most awesome sport EVER. Imagine baseball, except for in this you can fatally wound people if they even DARE to take a base. It’s a bloody and violent sport where the players take pride in how many they have both killed and wounded. Cobra isn’t just there to play, though. He’s been asked by one of the three sisters from the last arc, Dominique, to investigate a drug route that is tied to the RUG-BALL stadium. Dominique is an officer for the Galaxy Patrol, but they can’t infiltrate the stadium without evidence given it’s out of their jurisdiction. The arc doesn’t really focus on that much at all though, and is more about guys killing each other and calling each other bad names. Once again, it’s good fun.

20-21 has Cobra on a desert planet, which is the home of the SWORD people. He has to save these guys from a corrupt king, and lots of wacky sneaking around and shooting at things happens as per normal. This arc is probably one of the strangest, given it features an ocean of sand. Yes, and ocean of sand. By that I mean it acts exactly like a body of water in that it has waves, fish, and you can drown if you’re not careful. Also, don’t even get me started on the SWORD people.

Once again, I come out of this batch of episodes very much satisfied and entertained. A friend of mine described the appeal of Cobra perfectly. It’s just a simple show where a guy shoots stuff and gets a girl each episode, but they keep it fresh with clever and creative writing. I use the word fun a lot when talking about this show, because that’s just what it is– fun. It doesn’t really need to be anything more than that.

Anime sure has changed over the past 25 years!

Wow, I decided to watch Cobra on the year of its 25th anniversary and totally didn’t realize it. Spooky.

I’m right around the mid-point of Cobra now, and it’s pretty rockin’. I will admit I was slightly disappointed in the first arc, but ended in a more than satisfactory fashion, so all is well.

Episode 12 saw the end of the three sisters’ story, and episodes 13 and 14 are both one-shots. I found the progression of the three sisters’ arc to be kind of uninteresting, with lots of a planet hopping and woman gathering. However, each episode did have good opportunities for action and Cobra being a badass, which is what you’re really watching the show for anyway. Other fun touches are things like Cobra’s special top-of-the-line computer which uses a piano as an interface, his mind-reading device and tanks that can dig underground and traverse through sand. The climax of this arc is really what makes it worth it. It’s a showdown at a pyramid, with lots of fun Indiana Jones traps and James Bond gadgets at work. The story works its way to an awesomely ridiculous climax that I won’t spoil because it’s just too fucking awesome.

The 13th episode is a story about stolen gold and casinos and the 14th episode is about being racist towards Arabs (in the best way possible way, I assure you.) They’re both fun SF adventures that’ll tickle any boy’s desire to run about, shoot stuff and spout manly one-liners.

Half way through the show, and each episode still looks just as good as the first. I’m beginning to see why people call the ’80s the golden age of anime, since you can really see the bubble economy budget behind this. The animation is never jerky and the use of lighting effects is quite amazing. One fun thing about the animation is the use of dramatic stills. I understand this sounds weird considering I just talked about fluid animation, but let me explain. Dezaki has this thing that he does where he highlights dramatic moments with epic stills. For example, Cobra will do something badass and while he’s in the middle of doing so the cut will suddenly fade into an awesomely painted version of same image. For a good example of this, look at the image I used for this post.

One thing I should probably note is that ILA’s subs for the first 10 episodes of this are absolutely terrible. The wording is dodgy, grammar and spelling are often off and the translation misses a lot fine details. By episode 11 things seem to be back on track, but it is kind of bothersome for those first 10 episodes.

I have about 17 episodes left of this thing, so with luck, I should be done in at least a week or two. It’s not a terribly complex show so it’s easy to get through without too much effort. Provided it keeps delivering the wacky SF pulp, I’ll be satisfied.

SPACE ADVENTURE COBRA is a 31 episode TV series that ran between 1982 and 1983. The animation is by Tokyo Movie Shinsha (Lupin III) and directed by Osamu Dezaki (Ashita no Joe, Rose of Versailles.) The original comic, penned by Buichi Terasawa ran in Shounen Jump between 1978 and 1984, and has since been collected into 20 volumes. The TV series covers the first 8 volumes.

COBRA came from a time when shounen manga wasn’t about childish ninjas in track suits or angsty teenagers with giant swords. Cobra came from a time when shounen manga taught little kids how to LIVE as MEN when they grew up. They presented invincible badasses who could do no wrong to impressionable young children and Cobra is a perfect example of such a character. He has rugged manly looks, a built physique and never misses a shot. He’s a legendary space pirate who is wanted by everyone worth worrying about in the galaxy and to escape their clutches he goes as far as erasing his own memories and changing his appearance. However, legendary space pirates don’t disappear so easily…

Cobra, now under the name of Johnson, has been living a peaceful but rather boring life as a salary man for the past five years. He dreams of a life of excitement, and one day decides to partake in a Trip Movie; a service that allows one to live out their wildest dreams by projecting exciting images into their brain. Johnson’s Trip Movie experience places him in the boots of Cobra, a pirate who is wanted by the Pirate’s Guild. They’re after him because he refused to join them, insisting that true pirates operate alone. What Johnson slowly comes to realize is that these are his true memories that were sealed away five years ago. What follows is a sequence of events that leads Johnson to regaining his memories of being Cobra. By the end of episode one he’s already blowing up shit with his Psycho Gun, reunited with his android partner, Lady Armaroid, and is ready to set out towards the stars for more ADVENTURE.

Episode one sets the series off to an exciting start, and episode two is a one off which is meant to show Cobra in action before the real story begins. Episodes three through five are a little slower, but are the beginning of a longer story arc about a hidden treasure and three sisters who have the complete map to said treasure tattooed upon their backs. The production values are quite amazing in these first five episodes. The world in which Cobra lives is always fully animated and colourful, with an array of wacky and fun looking aliens. Action is well choreographed and fluid, and episodes are generally exciting making the most of the pulp sci-fi feel that the title evokes. Character designs are really realistic, but don’t look totally ugly like American cartoons from the same era. Cobra is realistically handsome and all the women are realistically beautiful.

The opening is a disco-ish number by Yoko Maeno that talks about how fucking rad Cobra is, while the ending theme is a slower jazzier piece. Background music is serviceable and well done, but nothing has jumped out at me as something I’d listen to on my own.

Space Adventure Cobra is shounen from when boys actually wanted to grow up to be men, and not weepy-eyed treehugging sissies. It has everything I look for in a shounen title along with a great pulpy SF feel, which is icing on the cake. It’s pure fun and anyone who enjoys a good old fashioned adventure will like it. Hopefully that applies to everyone reading.