Yotsunoha– nothing happens

Three years ago Nono Nekomiya and her friends Makoto Yuuki, Iori Yuzuki and Matsuri Amachi all buried a time capsule at their old school and promised to meet back on the same day three years later. Fast forward those three years, they all meet up again, then scriptwriter/director Hiroshi Nishikiori whips out his checklist of boring harem cliches and applies them with little effort or thought for about 30+ minutes. He tops it all off with the classic “main girl walks in on main guy hugging another girl but not out of love but it’s misunderstood since anime characters love jumping to conclusions” bit ending episode 1 on a thrilling cliffhanger, leaving its viewers waiting with bated breath for the next and final 40-minute masterpiece.

This show is so incredibly bland. I have nothing against harem shows, but if you’re going to give me one, it needs to have some teeth. Tenchi has spaceships, Key things have KyoAni and Shuffle! has MAGIC. Hell, even craptastic shows like They Are My Noble Masters still get by on the odd G-Gundam reference. As far as writing goes, this show has absolutely nothing going for it. You’ve seen all this shit before, and probably done better.

I’m not one to totally shit on a show though (no wait who am I kidding) so I’ll give credit where credit’s due. This show looks good. It’s apparently by Hal Film Maker, a studio I’ve never heard about since all they make is crap. As such, I’ve not really seen their stuff, but this is fucking beautiful from the backgrounds to the character animation. I only remember a few QUALITY shots here and there, but for the most part it’s solid work. It also has Yuuko Goto in it. She plays the blissful nee-san. It’s cute.

What is not cute is Nono’s voice. I remember hearing her give me a Valentine’s Day greeting last year, and pretended to like her voice so I could get lost in the sensation of a girl speaking to me at all, but after listening to this kid go on and on for nearly 40 minutes, I wanted to throw myself into the Charles River. GUYS. HER VOICE ISN’T CUTE. With each breath she sounds like she’s about to die, or something. I mean, I like weak girls a lot but… this NHK level moe-girl. Put her in a wheelchair or something.

Uh, so yeah. I guess if you like formulaic harem stuff with good production values, this’ll be up your alley. Otherwise, give it a miss.